Creepy Jizz of the Dark Side

Creepy Jizz of the Dark Side (working title) is a probably terrible parody of Jizz in my Pants by The Lonely Island, which describes Hush and the things he does. Enjoy. Or don't, since it probably says something bad about you if you do.

The Song
No eyes, in the dark I loom

You be the bride, I'll be the groom

Words in your head, “What is your name?”

Refuse to tell me, I'll make you lame

Combat starts, no retreat allowed

It's over quick, just like I vowed

Move in close as your insults fly

Our bodies touch and you start to cry

Leave this place, drag you back to mine

Our lips first touch sharing blood like wine

A single blade drawn down your neckline

Your soul's escape is so divine

That I jizz in my pants

I love it when this happens, you can take my word

I want to apologize but it'd go unheard.

A shame that this was such a brief romance

And now I jizz in my pants

I'll tell all your friends you were a fine Jedi

Recount our story when their end is nigh

Did I forget to mention they'll also die?

But after I learn their names.

I need a few things from the black market

Meet Sabriel Wickham, she's a hot tartlet

But I'm left heartbroken 'cause Nia needs her

Repress all my urges, hide my Force boner

Wait for the signal, then the slaughter starts

My soul put to ease as I carve out hearts

Never thought to find someone here to love

But as bodies pile high all the Force thereof

Builds to the point where I need release

So I sneak away while those around decease

And I jizz in my pants

Perfectly normal, I'm not the only one

Look at the other Cultists, they're all having fun

But for a moment I'm lost in a blissful trance

As I jizz in my pants

To be fair, that's a lot of death

Plus the way the corpses fell left me short of breath

Please stop acting like you didn't know

Now if we're all done here then away we go

Last week I met a man

As I recall he was a Kiffar man

Stepped up close and sank my blade

Saw the lights shine, heard the gurgles he made

While I jizzed in my pants

Speeding through the streets, chase my new lover

Pounce when I get close, she can't recover

The song in my head as her life-Force flees

Makes me jizz in my pants

The next day Vati hands me a gift

And I jizz in my pants

Open my window and Izu leaps in

Then I jizz in my pants

When Shaalir was dead from some offscreen event

I jizzed in my pants

I just ate a hopeful and I

Jizzed in my pants

I jizz right in my pants every time there's death near me

But then when Nia rants, I listen close and sincerely

Jedi say I'm nuts but they just can't see me clearly

And when it comes to death I treat the whole thing cavalierly

'Cause I jizz in my pants